Why advertisers should bid adieu to the “perfect mom” trope this year
The image of women as innate nurturers, always going that extra mile for their families is one that dominated advertising and marketing for decades, showing up in all kinds of ads, from cleaning products, to food, beauty products and everything in between. This self-sacrificing woman puts her family first, and in more recent decades, ably handles a career on top of the multitude of school bake sales and costume contests she happily partakes in. Balancing family and career comes easily to this perfect wife and mother, yet no one ever seems to wonder what she’s doing to take care of herself through it all.
Credit: Chatbooks
For as long as this trope has been around, it’s been driving women crazy, giving them the sense that they are somehow failing in motherhood and life because their homes never seem to reflect the Pinterest boards of their peers. The “perfect mom” archetype isn’t just unrealistic for the vast majority of women, but also creates a stressful imbalance of priorities that leaves their own well-being last on the list.
Compare that with the fact that heart disease is the number one killer of women in America. It’s more deadly than all forms of cancer combined, killing 1 in 3 women. Unlike so many other diseases, the things that can prevent heart disease--adopting a healthy diet, exercising, avoiding stress--are based entirely around self-care. As women race to “have it all,” that care and attention to personal wellness is too often the first thing to go.
This is why I find the emergence of the “imperfect mom” we’re starting to see in advertising and the media so refreshing. From the recent film, “Bad Moms” to shows like “The Mindy Project” and “Mom” entertainment is trending towards stories of real women with nuanced personalities and problems. From a cultural perspective, advertising generally follows on the heels of entertainment, and we’re seeing honest portrayals of moms who are calling out the pressure to be Pinterest-perfect in ads like this relatable viral series from Chatbooks, which features a hilarious straight-talking mom dealing with the chaos of her life with two kids. These women aren’t striving to be perfect. Sure, they are stressed out some of the time, but they are just trying to do the best they can with what they have, and trying to have some fun with it all along the way.
Of course, these representations of moms don’t directly encourage women to take better care of themselves. But I would argue they do something just as important. They send the message to women that it’s ok if your life isn’t always Instagram-ready. That being a “good enough” mom is just that - good enough. That permission to just relax and let some things go can be a huge weight off of women. Instead of feeling like they need to be keeping a perfectly clean house, they can go run around outside with their kids, or imagine, go running by themselves. Taking away some of that societal pressure can go a long way towards improving women’s health and wellness in the long term. And, the brands that lean into that message will no doubt be welcomed by mom’s feeling the wellness pinch around the world.
As we move into 2017, I see the “imperfect mom” becoming the new hero in advertising. In an era where authenticity and relatability are the most important aspects of engagement, how could she not be? The so-called perfect mom in advertising had a good run of a hundred years or so but it’s time for a well-deserved retirement. Brands best beware the next time they choose “perfect mom” as their protagonist. The “real” women can handle it from here.
Kathy Delaney is the global CCO of Publicis Health