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Political Chatter: a copywriter’s look at the election

By Andrew Boulton

April 7, 2015 | 6 min read

I must confess, aside from Nigel Farage’s unnervingly moist face during the televised leaders' debate, not a great deal about the upcoming general election has caught my attention.

However, aside from a man looking like he’s just motor-boated a snowman (but not one of those foreign snowmen, coming over here taking our carrots and old hats) the language of electioneering does arouse a certain professional interest. It’s particularly the delicate (or not quite so) art of billboard headlines that prods my curiosity.

Take, for example, the Conservatives' latest effort that depicts a tiny Ed Miliband tucked neatly into the pocket of former first minister of Scotland Alex Salmond. Although there is no language on the posters, there’s an unspoken headline that equates, crudely, to: ‘Scotland want to f*ck us and this tiny man loves deep fried Curly Wurlys more than he loves Prince William’s unborn child’.

Stepping back from the nuanced political purpose of such advertising (and I confess freely that I know more about Jurassic Park 2 than I do about British politics) the Conservatives seem to be talking in the playground parlance of ‘picking sides’ – although not necessarily with the opposition you would expect.

From a marketing point of view, this is ostensibly an advert for ‘Scotland Want To Get Us’. Regardless of what political capital is to be gained or lost from such a move, through the prism of advertising it seems the Conservatives are selling a divide – and one that the SNP would perhaps welcome rather than resist. (But it’s entirely possible that I was so busy thinking about Jeff Goldblum karate-chopping a velociraptor in the windpipe, I’ve entirely missed the point.)

Either way, it’s a clear step away from the much derided ‘Let’s Stay On The Road to a Stronger Economy’ adverts in which a headline for a robust Britain was plastered over the image of an idyllic country road that just happens to be near Weimar in Germany. Needless to say this particular advert, as well as the Miliband-Pocket affair, were delicious fodder for the nation’s memesters.

UKIP, as one would expect, are ploughing a rather different furrow. Their campaign poster is a refreshed version of an earlier effort in which escalators invitingly lead the way up the white cliffs of Dover – an unguarded portal for all of those international ne’er do wells to sneak in with their funny habits, gods and sausages.

The headline rather functionally reads ‘Immigration Is 3 Times Higher Than The Tories Promised’ and is supported with their familiar ‘No Border, No Control’ strapline. As scaremongering goes it does a potent job of jabbing indignation into the eyes and brains of those who readily believe that immigrants cause floods and want to cancel Strictly Come Dancing. Purely from a copywriting point of view, it’s a blunt but faultless example of knowing your audience and strumming their festering anxieties like you’re a Mumford and Son.

The Green Party’s approach was a more precise piece of marketing. Picturing only leader Natalie Bennett and MP Caroline Lucas, the line simply read ‘What Are You Afraid of Boys?’ – a carbon-footprint in the arse for the reticence of established parties to invite the Greens into the debates. A supporting hashtag of #InviteTheGreens garnered strong support, and having an injustice to campaign behind led to a boost in the polls.

The Greens’ supporting line ‘The Politics Of The Future Doesn’t Have To Be The Politics of The Past’, though perhaps a little trite, is an effective way to frame themselves for an election that, we are persistently told, is being contested by indistinguishable parties and decided by unengaged voters.

Labour, reportedly being wildly outspent by the Conservatives, haven’t produced anything (cough, that I’ve actually noticed). This is perhaps something of a shame, as their 2010 effort depicting David Cameron as fictional TV detective Gene Hunt and bearing the line ‘Don’t Let Him Take Britain Back To The 1980s’ was a rare example of humour for the meme generation, in amongst the ominous and unsettling headlines.

For this election, Labour have publicly declared their intention to move away from negative personal adverts. Perhaps this is wise, as although the 2010 billboard was supposed to be a reference to social unrest and Thatcheresque rises in youth employment, the subtleties were largely missed and even David Cameron was left claiming he was flattered to be portrayed as the tough, dynamic copper.

At the bottom of the pile, so to speak, is a Liberal Democrat effort I only saw for the first time today. It shows chancellor George Osborne and his shadow, Ed Balls, with the headline ‘Look Left, Look Right and Then Cross’ – an almost mind-bending lunge for an ‘even middler’ bit of the heavily congested political middle.

I think the kindest possible comparison I could make to the Lib Dem campaign would be if you or I were to advertise a soft drink by claiming it was neither too fizzy, nor too still, just a formless compromise that would leave your mouth feeling dry, wet and impossibly sad. Which is maybe what they were going for.

Follow Andrew for more election* news @Boultini

*Jurassic Park 2

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