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Stinky words: The pungent aroma of fragrance ad copywriting

By Andrew Boulton

December 29, 2014 | 3 min read

Not long ago I wrote a piece for The Drum suggesting that we shouldn’t be afraid to employ copy that asks the reader to think a little bit harder. Typically, like many of my poorly-reasoned arguments, events have caused it to crash to the ground like a glue-sniffing pigeon.

Or, perhaps less dramatically, I’ve come across a particular example where ‘challenging’ copy is being grossly misused – namely, Christmas adverts for premium fragrances.

This niche little pocket of the form is not a new phenomena. In fact, at about this time last year, I wrote another piece for The Drum that proposed my own impenetrably arty concept that involved Ryan Gosling grappling with a robot space-dolphin from the future.

But what has occurred to me this year is that the language of these adverts (or at least the ones who choose to include some sort of spoken narrative) is highly damaging to anyone who believes copy should always not be reduced down to its broadest and most instantaneous appeal. Simply put, when the Chanels, Guccis and Dolce & Gabbanas of the world talk such ferocious piffle it makes it difficult for the rest of us to argue for the effectiveness of a more elaborate approach.

The root of the problem, I believe, lies in the expensively maintained teeth and gums of the famous people who speak the lines. For unfathomable reasons, if Matthew McConaughey says that his aftershave smells like an eagle dipped in a volcano of liquid diamonds, it is strangely more forgivable than if Barry Scott from the Cilit Bang adverts spoke precisely the same words.

I’m not saying that we are universally blinded by beautiful and famous faces – I find more people who are actively annoyed by the pretentiousness of these ads than those who look forward to them in the way they have begun to anticipate, say, John Lewis’ annual effort. But within the industry there is clearly a belief that vague and hokey language is acceptable when it’s coming out of Scarlett Johansen’s admittedly lovely face.

Perhaps I am being unkind, but I feel that hiring great actors (a very different beast to celebrities) gives copywriters a unique vehicle for their lines. Surely, given this opportunity, you would want to create something compelling and memorable, not something so noticeably contrived that it leaves an audience stranded somewhere in the adjoining territories of bafflement, irritation, disinterest or sneering amusement.

Imagine excellent copy spoken by one of the most engaging (not to mention dishy) people on the planet. Surely that would smell better? Perhaps like a tranquil lagoon filled with continental meats and snooker balls.

Follow Andrew Boulton on Twitter. He smells like dusty light bulbs. https://twitter.com/boultini

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